You Give Me Fever - Jungle Fever!

Picture from

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I'm not a huge fan of pick up lines...neither giving nor receiving.  Over the weekend, I got a winner though.  I was out on the town celebrating my birthday with a few friends (at Taylor's of course).  We were standing against the bar, playing the role of happy little wallflowers when a gentleman approached me and said, "Has a white guy ever looked at you and told you 'I think I have jungle fever'?"  Perhaps it was the drinks, or the atmosphere or maybe even my little black and white dress that prompted my suitor's bold advance.  Tact might not have been his strong suit, but originality was!

Jungle Fever wasn't the only bug going around Taylor's that night.  Wearing a white three-piece disco suit, another gentleman clearly caught a case of Saturday Night Fever.  My friends spotted him at the edge of the dance floor staring at me.  His intense looks made us wonder if his interest was genuine or if admiring me was only a cover for the C4 he had planted in the bathroom.  Either way, we all made it out alive and disco dude eventually got the hint.


An Offer You Can't Refuse...

The-Godfather - Make him an offer.jpg

For some strange reason, this story came to the forefront of my mind and of course I had to share it with all of you.  Back in my clubbing days (approximately 3.4 years ago) , I was out with a good friend of mine.  She looked absolutely stunning.  Her short pixie cut complimented her smooth skin and model-like frame perfectly.  I swear this girl could have stepped off of the cover of a magazine.

Apparently I wasn't the only person who thought so.  As we walked the familiar path from our illegally parked cars to our destination, a group of guys approached us.  Well, at least I thought it was us.  It was really just my friend.  The leader of the pack looked her square in the face and said, "You're so fine I want you to have my baby.  I'll give you the money right now and see you in nine months." Wait, what?

I'm sorry sir.  I think I misunderstood.  Did you really just proposition someone you don't even know to have a child with you simply based off of her looks?  What if she were a man-eating shape shifter?  Or a beautiful alien sent to procreate and take over the planet earth?  Or what about just good ol' fashioned crazy?  Now, I'm pretty sure this was just a conversation starter; however, where does one take a conversation from there?  The whole ordeal was pretty hilarious.  It got me thinking, what other outrageous pick up lines are going around these days?