Frog Smooching At Its Finest

Kermit the Frog kissing Queen Latifah with Miss Piggy on the left

Kermit the Frog kissing Queen Latifah with Miss Piggy on the left

If you're going to smooch a frog, what better one to smooch than the hottest, smoothest, most talented amphibian out there.  That's right.  I'm talking about the one, the only, Kermit the Frog.

Kermit & Miss Piggy visited the Queen Latifah show on the release day of "Muppets Most Wanted".  As you can see from the picture above, Kermit got his smooch on with the Queen, while Miss Piggy carefully observed from two feet away.

Speaking of Miss Piggy, I had an epiphany while watching the movie this weekend.  She is a grade A, bona fide hood chick.  Hear me out now.  She rocks a different hairstyle with clothes to match every time you see her.  She wears fake lashes. She's beyond reasoning...even if her logic is completely nonsensical.  And she's ready to fight for (or with) her man at a moment's notice.  Don't make her mad because she is proof that a woman scorned, regardless of ethnicity (or in this case species) is nothing to mess with.  Unfortunately, she allows Kermit to string her along without any real commitment.  Hmmm...

Movie review for "Muppets Most Wanted" coming soon.

Feature Films = Couples Counseling

What do television and relationship therapy have in common?  Apparently a lot.  A recent study conducted by the University of Rochester showed that couples who watched "chick flicks" were twice as likely to stay together than the group that didn't.  These results were comparable to those of couples who attended counseling.

Most of the films selected weren't your everyday ROMCOM.  They were more serious relationship films like "Steel Magnolias" and "The Notebook".  It makes perfect sense.  Movies that deal with real life issues open people up, and make them feel more vulnerable. They might reveal details that their significant other didn't know, or had forgotten about.  Communication creates a sense of intimacy.  The deeper the conversation, the more connected one feels to his or her partner. 

So don't waste your money on counseling. Turn on Netflix and save your relationship today.   What can I say?  I'm kind of a cheapskate. 

S/n: I wonder if "Twilight" made the list...with talk of a zombie apocalypse, it's good to know where you and your partner stand.

Beauty & the Bill Collector (Part One)

Over the past two weeks, my friend Jen has been in the process of developing the unlikeliest of romances.  What makes this courtship seem out of the norm even by the resident Frog Smoocher herself?  Well, the story goes a little something like this...

Jen has student loans - as many of us do.  There were modifications and errors that needed to be corrected on her account. She had been shuffled around many times, but to no avail. She finally decided enough was enough and escalated the matter.  Little did she know what fate had in store for her.

"This better be the last time they transfer me," she muttered under her breath.  Not even a minute passed before he answered the phone.  Ethan was his name.  His voice calmed her like an opiate.  He spoke in a deep baritone, reassuring her that her issues would be resolved.  Something about Ethan's aura set him apart from any bill collector she had ever spoken to.  She knew he wasn't going to leave her stranded like the others. Could it be?

Ethan told Jen that he had to call another department to obtain information for her account.  He conferenced her in, and they waited on hold together.  A moist residue formed on her cell phone case alerting her that her palms were sweating.  And then it happened...he started a conversation with her.  Not just any run of the mill, "how's the weather where you're located", Customer Service bs conversation.  This...this was real.  

Ethan began telling her about a recent trip he took to Brazil.  He wooed her with tips on finding great travel deals and doing investigative research on hotels before making the big purchase.  Jen twirled a few strands of hair around her finger while she listened attentively, captivated by his warmth.  She had gotten so deep into the conversation that she forgot what she originally called in for.  Another representative's voice interrupted their special moment, jerking her back into reality.

Jen's chest deflated at the thought of her 800# romance ending so quickly.  True, she wanted the nightmare with her loans to end.  Yet a small part of her desired Ethan's presence a little longer.  Five minutes later, and her wish was granted.  She made a quick sign of the cross knowing that divine intervention had been bestowed upon her.  More information was needed and her issue couldn't be resolved that day.

Ethan apologized profusely then provided her with his direct line. Lowering his voice a touch, he told her that he didn't give that information to just anybody.  Her cheeks burned red with desire.  "He probably tells that to all of his customers," she thought to herself.  But even the most logical of thoughts couldn't break through the haze his presence left behind.  Ethan made promises and gave her information that no one else had.  He was different.  She caressed the side of her phone softly after they said their goodbyes.  "Until next week, Ethan," she said smiling ever so slightly.

To be continued...