Jay Z & Beyonce: Sweet Dream or Beautiful Nightmare

The internet and fans alike have been abuzz since Solange laid the smackdown on Jay Z.  What happened? Why did she do it?  Could this be the end of the inseparable Bonnie  & Clyde?  For me, the only oddity about Solange's display was that someone caught it on camera.  I've quietly assessed Jay & Bey's relationship for some time, and finally decided to break the silence.  Love it, hate it or sick the Beyhive on me.  Here goes...

The Mrs. Carter World Tour:

Speculations of infidelity and the power couple not being as happy as they seemed came well before the announcement of the tour.  But the name of the tour itself is what made me twist my head to the side and furrow my eyebrows slightly.  Beyonce has made a name for herself on her own.  Why the need to suddenly showcase her "Mrs" title to the world?  Married women love to show off their new last names...usually when they are newlyweds.  Mr. & Mrs. Carter had been married for about four years at that point.  It appeared as though Bey was trying to prove a point. 

I reasoned that she was probably receiving backlash from the public that she wasn't being "wifely" enough to her husband.  I mean, when you drop an album, a baby, land a Pepsi deal then rock the Superbowl, simpletons are going to find SOMETHING to talk about.  Perhaps the talk was finally getting to her, and she wanted to show the world that she intended to stand by her man.  Either that, or she was taking a stand against those women chasing after (or being chased by) her man.  Regardless of her rationale, something wasn't clean in the milk.

Beyonce's Self Titled Album (that was really all about sexing her man)

Beyonce's most recent album was a self-proclaimed representation of her independence, sexuality and feminist views.  Most notably, though, were the explicit sexual references about her love life with Jay.  When I watched "Partition" for the first time, I was both flabbergasted and saddened. 

While we cannot hold Beyonce responsible for the ills of society, she has undeniable influence.  Yes, the argument can be made that her & Jay Z are married and can do whatever they want (preferably behind closed doors) but the message that video sends - you are performing for a man who is simply sitting there watching you as you spew raunchy, desperate lyrics.  For those who are anticipating your every move, just waiting to emulate - this is what they see.  I'm sorry, but I hold someone who sang at the first black president's inaugural ball to a higher standard (higher than I should have apparently...but that's besides the point). 

Then a level of sympathy kicked in.  The lyrics to her chorus replayed in my mind "take all of me...I just want to be the one you like...the one you like is right here with me."  Her words sounded more like a plea each time I thought about it.  A plea from a woman who knows her man is wandering.  Who wants so desperately for him to see her and love her for who she is.  Who doesn't want the media circus associated with a high profile, messy divorce.  A plea from a woman who wants to be loved.  Man, I saw it so vividly.  And I felt for her.  A few friends listened to my theory, but dismissed it for the most part.  But the next occurrence couldn't be so easily forgotten.

The Elevator Fight

Ring the alarm, she's been through it to long, but Solange'll be damned if she sees another chick on his arm.  Anyone find it odd that Beyonce did NOTHING to stop her sister from wailing on her hubby?  I sure did. Whether it was Rachel Roy or Rihanna, there are only two things that cause a fight like that within a family: money or infidelity.  And for a couple whose net worth is nearly $1billion, I'm pretty sure that ain't it.  So what could drive a sibling over the edge like that?

Well I certainly don't know.  What I do know is Beyonce's level of chill vs. Solange's anger signaled Beyonce's approval of her sister's behavior.  Who would know better what was happening behind closed doors than her only sibling?  Then, of course, publicists have to come in with the cleaning crew.  Downplay it by saying Solange was drunk, and show some pictures of everyone playing nice a few days later (seriously does anybody believe Jay was playing catch in the yard with Solange's son...it just looked awkward).  That video gave a naked glimpse into one of the most private celebrity couples' life.  And it was a far cry from Bey's HBO doc "Life is But a Dream". 

On the Run Tour

See summation of Mrs. Carter World Tour above. She wanted the world to know that's her man.  Although it has been noted that during one of their shows she changed the lyrics of "Resentment", a song about a cheating mate, to reflect the length of time her and Jay Z were together.  It was also said that at another show, she broke down crying uncontrollably while singing the song.  With all of the media attention on them right now, it wouldn't surprise me if her jabs toward Jay are planned to keep people talking and buying tickets. 

So What Now???

Hmmm...that's a good question.  Tabloids and celeb gossip sites are continuing to have a field day.  InTouch magazine reports that the couple is Skyping with marriage counselors while they are on tour in an attempt to save their marriage. Another source states that the therapists are there to help them split amicably.  They might not split at all.  We really won't know until they want us to. 

But there's another piece I'd like to address.  Take away all of the fame and fortune.  Beyonce is still a woman.  Many of us have been in her shoes.  I've been there.  I'm sure plenty of you have been there.  It's painful when someone you love betrays you, doesn't reciprocate the level of commitment you've displayed and breaks their vows.  Her anthems gave me strength during some of my roughest times.  I pray that she has a good circle of people around her who helps her to focus on improving her quality of life while blocking out the media circus.

Thoughts? Comments? Opinions?  The box is below...feel free to use it!

I Solicit Signatures, Not Sex

One of the projects I recently participated in was helping a friend of mine campaign for an upcoming election.  Most of the work I did was behind the scenes (or should I say behind the screen). However, when the petitioning process began, I had no choice but to get my ass off of the couch.

When candidates run for office, they must obtain a certain amount of signatures from people registered within their political party.  This is what's called "petitioning".  Hitting the trail was a new experience for me. I felt apprehensive about it.  What do you say?  How do you ask strangers for their signatures?  I knew it had to be done, but how...HOW???

The answer to that question was two-fold.  A fellow volunteer for the campaign gave me a tutorial.  I tagged along while he worked his magic on patrons at one of our local Farmer's Markets.  It seemed easy enough.  And with a wave of my clipboard, I was off.

As it turned out, having a smooth spiel wasn't the only asset I possessed to get the job done.  Quite a few male callers took this as an opportunity to put their moves on me.  A lot of my conversations went something like this:

Me: "Hi. Are you a registered democrat living in the city of Rochester?"

Random guy: "Yes, I am."

Me: (thought bubble)  My face is up here.  "My friend [insert name here] is running for [insert position here]. Would you be willing to sign the petition to get her on the ballot?"

Random guy: "Sure. Anything for you."

Some attempted to carry the conversations further, venturing off into unrelated topics.  I politely ended them by nabbing my next victim.  A sprightly 68-year-old gentleman even kissed me on the cheek.  I warded him off with my clipboard.  Worst yet, he didn't even give me a signature.  The whole experience just made me feel dirty.

All in all, we were successful in our endeavor.  It did reinforce my belief that frogs come in all shapes, sizes and ages. Well that, and clipboards can be handy weapons!

Summer Madness

Summer Madness.png

"It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you..."

For some reason, I felt the need to start off with that line.  Well, it has been a long time and I am ELATED to get back to Smooching Frogs.  A few major items have been on the horizon (see pic above); thus, my attention has been elsewhere.  But I'm ba-ack!  Stay tuned. A lot of goodies are coming your way :-)