Repost: Military Maniac


I love a man in a uniform!  Something about a disciplined man with a crisp suit and badges drives me crazy (in a good way).  When the opportunity presented itself for me to go out on a date with one, I jumped at it.  Anything for my country, right?

Photo from dateswithkate.com where this story was shared as a guest post.

Photo from dateswithkate.com where this story was shared as a guest post.


He wanted to pick me up from my house. Through an unfortunate series of events, I was already privy to the dangers of giving my address out to a complete stranger.  I offered to meet him and we decided on a movie.  After the movie, we went out for food and drinks.  Our conversation began with the normal pleasantries.  Then somewhere along the lines it took a turn for the worst.

My first clue that this was headed for disaster was when he revealed his dating philosophy. He stated that he and I were not on a date.  It was simply a friendly outing because he only wanted to go out on dates with his future girlfriend...whoever she may be.  He went on to tell me that he was tired of damaged women, then used me as an example!  Apparently my refusal to give him my address translated to me projecting my "men" issues onto him.

I explained in great detail why I did not give him my address.  With an appalled expression he replied, "I don't think I would have told that on the first date."  Mentally I summoned the waitress to bring the check.  Unfortunately, telepathy was not a part of her job description. 

We ventured further into our conversation for reasons that can only be explained by my alcohol consumption.  At some point, I made a statement that he did not agree with.  He responded by telling me that women don't listen.  He went on to say that women have never listened which is why God cursed them.  It was official.  This date was going down in the books, and I was going home!

Later that night, I received a text from him:

        MM:  I wanted to kiss you tonight.

        Me: I didn't feel that same way. 

I toyed with the idea of suggesting that he trade his uniform in for a straitjacket.  Two days later he received his pink slip via text message, and I never heard from the Military Maniac again.  


A Selfie to Keep to Yourself

Yup.  That's me in the jacket & sequins sock covers...

Yup.  That's me in the jacket & sequins sock covers...

A couple of years ago during my first tryst with online dating, I had a little trouble getting my sea legs under me.  Communicating with individuals that I didn't know seemed so awkward.  Who should initiate the conversation?  What's proper protocol to interact with someone online?  How many times should I tolerate blatant assassination of the English language before emailing a link to merriamwebster.com?

It all felt so overwhelming.  Then I saw a guy who caught my eye.  His profile picture showed him to be tall and handsome with caramel colored skin and short, curly, black hair.  Spelling & grammar did not allude him as his profile was perfectly written.  I had two mental fainting spells before sending him a message.

We chatted a bit online before exchanging phone numbers, and transitioning to text messages.  His name was Michael.  Michael Gabrielle.  "What a beautiful name," I commented.  I really did love his name.  So much so that I felt it apropos to divulge my love of MJ to him.   Without further prompting, I sent him a photo of myself dressed up in a "Thriller" costume for Halloween.  In my defense, I thought it would be a great ice breaker - demonstrating that I was the perfect blend of brains, beauty and humor.  Unfortunately, it gave off more of a "sideshow freak" vibe.  I never heard from him again.

On the brighter side of things, I certainly know what NOT to do in the future.  Although my learning didn't help me here.