Fight Night

 Leave it to me to go to a casino and find a Michael Jackson slot machine...

Leave it to me to go to a casino and find a Michael Jackson slot machine...

A couple of weeks ago my friend Nikki and I went to a boxing match.  Neither one of us knew much about boxing or entirely understood how the game is played.  What I did know was where there’s sports, there’s men.  The fact that the venue was about two hours from where we live and the event was being filmed by ESPN added to the allure. 

Upon our arrival, we wandered in through the Bingo entrance.  To our left was a sea of slot machines complete with patrons who were either down on their luck or intended to die right there in the casino.  No, seriously…one guy was on oxygen.  My plan appeared to be crumbling right before our very eyes. 

We made it to the reception area, which catered to a different crowd. The concierge directed us through an expansive lobby with high ceilings and regal décor.  Best of all, we spotted people with life in them. I mentally wiped imaginary sweat from my brow.  When Nikki and I arrived at our final destination, we looked around the unfamiliar faces in admiration.

“See anything you like,” I asked.

“Yes,” she smiled. “Options!”  Where we come from there aren’t many of those. 

At some point (I’m sure after a drink or two) I came up with the “Bump” game.  What is that, you ask?  Well, if we saw someone we liked, we were going to perform a ring check from afar then find a way to “accidentally” bump into them – sparking a conversation.  In theory, this sounded like a good theory.

I finally spotted a bumpworthy candidate in one of the nightclubs attached to the casino.  I looked over at my fellow bump bandit Nikki and boldly announced, “I’m going in.”  She laughed.  I strolled up to my unsuspecting prey then went in for the kill.  To my surprise, he dodged it.  A bit confused, I played back the scene in my head.  Of course he dodged it!  If someone in plain sight appeared to be on a collision course with you, why wouldn’t you move?  Furthermore, we were in a club.  He probably thought I was drunk! After further analysis, bumping into strange men in an attempt to strike up conversation probably wasn’t a great idea after all.

Later that night, I was pleasantly assaulted by a security guard at another club.  He was ca-yute.  Plus I enjoyed conversing with him.  I chatted him up for a bit when the crowd died down, and we exchanged numbers.  Imagine that – be yourself, turn up the charm and the universe works itself out.

As far as the boxing match goes, I surprised myself with how much I actually knew about the sport.  That, and shouting “go all Million Dollar Baby on ‘em” is outdated (or was never really a thing to begin with). Overall, we had an amazing experience.  The night goes down in the books as one of our best.