I was surfing the web a few days ago and came across this article. During a family get together on the eve of his sister's wedding, blogger Dan Pierce began reflecting on why his previous marriages went badly. His list went on to reach over 404,000 people and gained over 3800 comments on his webpage.
His tips are charming and practical. I'm sure that encouraging fellow men not to "poop with the bathroom door open" garners favor from women everywhere. However, what stood out to me the most was not the content of his article, but the manner in which it was written. Pierce actually took the time to reflect and take accountability for the things that he did wrong in his previous marriages. He could have easily used his blog as a forum to bash his exes. Instead, he chose to share his learning experiences with others.
People do have the ability to change. The kicker is that they will only change for themselves...not anyone else. If you are dating someone with a bit of bad history, I would encourage you to ask questions and pay close attention to their actions. Do they take responsibility for what happened in their previous relationships, or do they blame it solely on the other person? Are their actions congruent with their words? It is possible for people to learn from their mistakes with the right amount of time and self-reflection. I wish Mr. Pierce many blessings in the future :-).
P.S. Introspection is something that ALL people should do in relationships. We also have flaws and items that can be worked on. The more you recognize them for what they are, the more successful your relationships will be (not just romantic). A little food for thought...